  what up g,  dawgs,  dizzles and doggettes yeah okay,  so i stole the title from katrina,  but its fits so,  it was only fitting to take it,  im not creative gimme a break so this blog has nohing to do with the days events just pointless rambling and bitching by me that isnt recent nor not bitched about b4,
 its just down on paper now,  or on virtual paper rather.  & nbsp;  Daddy Wasn't There So first theres my dad,  who im still not sure whether to love or to hate most of the time. nbsp;  Like yeah he cheated on my mom with a family friend,
 and tried to cover it up.
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 IT went on for soo long him and my mom living a lie,  pretending to be a happy family when they knew he was living some secret life,  a bigass lie.  Everyone knew in the family,  but us,  well i mean all the adults and children old enough to understand.
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 Now,  my mom's side OBVIOUSLY backs up my mom,  nad hates him,  and my dad's side OBVIOUSLY backs him up somehow they justified it.
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 but their oldschool,
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 my mom's sisters are all like " keep the family together to protect the sanctity of marriage (
cuz i have a feeling some of them are doing that too,  but we'll not get into that)  but the younger ppl,  are like " dumb the fucker like a bag o bricks"  long story short after much secrecy my mom told us,  and after much tears,  she kicked him out,  she figured itd be hte only way he could learn sure enough he hates life with her,
 stupid fucker,  os now they ruined 2 families lives and both want back.
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 (
theres also some money shyte involved in the matter,  her husband has a great job,  and my mom has a great job,  my dad works hard but nvr had money to show for it,  speculation has it he was funding his other life,  but thats speculation)
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 so again to shorten hte story,  nigga wants back into the family and my mom is letting him now i dont know about this still,  but hes making the effort maybe just cuz i was nvr really close to my dad in the first place,  we nvr had stuff in common and i always feared that he didnt like me,  he always bought my shyte so that we'd be close,
 his passion is music so starting with piano lesons for the brothers was the first step in getting close to us,  i was the only one who didnt take an interest in the piano,  so we nvr got close,  last yea he bought me&
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a sax ( which showed his knowledge of me,  considering i was playing clarinet at the time)
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 Anyhoo i like hte sax so we bond on that level i guess,  the only other thing we have in common is that we debate,  although hes oldschool and i hate his views on current stuff like homosexuality and the role of males in life ( mainly cuz i dont fit this standard male role)
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 so now hes trying to get back with us,  he arrangeed a cottage trip and a camping trip ( this is the man who HATES camping for the last 5 years we'd go camping and he'd opt out cuz he didn't like the idea of roughing it (
unless this had something to do with the divorce and infedelity in some way)  so yeah i dont know what to do now love or hate,  i mean he IS my father,  but has he REALLY been a male role model?
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 Smoke Screen Next pet peeve is people who put up a fak personality or archetype just to pretend to be someone they are not now myabe its cuz they wanna be excepted and all but iunno,
 maybe they do it unconsciously now we can all sit here and say we hate " fake"  ppl but what IS an architype REALLY,  how can you truly be who YOU are,  we all have adopted our personality somewhow,  right,  by the people we hang around with and our family and parents&
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 and such,  of course there is that peronality in your genes,  i think,  but everything you see and anyone you meet effects your personality.  now i thought this girl,  mandy,  from work was fake as hell,  the typical brown girl who parties out with ppl attracts the wierdest drama and then goes home and is the perfect little angel,  this is how most western world brown girls are.
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 SHE said that SHE hated fake people too,
 and i wanted to tell her that she was as fake as they come,  but i didnt.  this OTHER girl from work told me that i wasnt brown enough,  becouse i listen to rock music,  go camping,  cottaging and all the other things that i do.
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 I'm NOT a thug,  i DONT listen to ONLY rap music,  thats NOT me,  i am who i am,  but then again,  who am I?
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 How did I get this archetype?
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 through family,  originally i used to be that typical brown guy listening to rap music acting all thug,  'casue my cousoins used to do it,
 so i just took after them,  but then my friends weremt at pearson and bosco they were the average pop culture people,  cept for fusca the rocker who told me everyday that rap sucked,  and i' fight him to the death on it,  i guess they influenced the pop into my life,  and then theres the new wave of influence,  recently as my brother now plays drums and my other brother guitar,  we learned that there is no muscianship in rap,  and returned to the rock and pop,  with the rap,  hip hop and dance thrown in there,  now i've ALWAYS like rock secretly,  though my family thought it was weird that i did,
 but meh.
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 So now i listen to almost everything,  for different reason of course,  rap and dance and sometimes pop is good to dance to,  rock you cant really dance to,  just kinda move ot hte rhythm,  you listen to it and wanna run around,  and pop is just easy listening,  lest we forget te good ol' classic rock like led zepplin and stuff,
 good for chillin',  and beatles is easy music to pick up on the guitar,
 piano,
 drums or the sax of course.  so now i wasn't always this way,  does that make me fake too?  am i fake in what i do?  I asked drew to pin my archetype and he couldnt,
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of course i dont think he knows what an archetype is,  he said mine was " the school vice president"  dumbass!
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 either way does that make me unique or conforming to all types of people and being whatever when i need to be and lets not talk about a certain someone we all know who is the epitamy of fakeness,
 not naming any names,  he might be reading &
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 yup,  thats enough for now,  this is WAAAAAAY too long,  and look,  i didnt write one yesterday,  ha!
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