  I remember the date clearly: August 21st, 2003. For a few weeks I had been feeling overwhelmingly tired...all I ever thought about any more was sleeping. My monthly friend was well over a week late, and Thomas kept kidding that I must be pregnant. Even though I had never been late before, for some reason it still hadn't occurred to me that pregnancy was a real possibility. I kept assuming that I must be coming down with some type of virus, or maybe my mono was coming back with a veangeance!
By the 21st, Thomas's teasing was starting to annoy me...I knew my body and I KNEW I WASN'T PREGNANT !! I figured the best way to make him stop was simply to take a pregnancy test. When it came out negative, I could hand it him the proof and concentrate on my new top priority in life, sleeping! It was easy enough to buy the test. CVS was across the street from our apartment building and Thomas didn't even know I had walked over there. With no one the wiser, I walked into the bathroom, took the test and prepared to wait the prerequisite three minutes for my results. I was in store for the shock of my lifetime. Not even twenty seconds after taking the test two bold lines starting making there way across the face of the strip circle. For a moment I sat there and simply looked at it, not quite comprehending what my eyes were telling me. I waited the three minutes, stupidly assuming that maybe one of those lines would disappear. When the test remained unchanged after another five minutes, I stumbled out to the living room, totally unnerved and at a complete loss of what to do next.
I stared closely at my husband, who was casually washing dishes. I watched my sister Sydney who was playing Grand Theft Auto on Playstation, oblivious to anything or anyone else. It was a surreal moment for me. I felt like my whole world had just been irrevocably turned on its head, never to return back to normal.....and no one was noticing but me!
I thought about grabbing Thomas right then and there, dragging him into the bedroom and telling him the news, but I was still trying to figure out how *I* was feeling about the fact that we were about to have a baby. Could I handle being pregnant? Was I ready to face the responsibility of having a baby? Could I even care for a baby? How in the world was I going to make it through labor and delivery?!? I desperately wanted someone to talk to, to help me process all this information, but I felt too overwhelmed to initiate conversation.
I sat on the couch, pretending to watch Sydney play Grand Theft Auto, but really lost in my own thoughts. Every half-hour or so, I would excuse myself to go the bathroom and pull out the pregnancy test from it's hiding spot to stare at it and make sure it hadn't changed. I did this compulsively until it neared midnight and Thomas had long ago gone to bed. I suddenly decided I couldn't wait anymore to tell Thomas...I was nearly bursting at the seams. At first, I shook Thomas gently. Sound asleep, this failed to rouse him. I shook him harder and called his name firmly.
This time I got a grunt "Huh...wha?? " I took this as my cue to tell him the news "Thomas, wake up, I have something important to tell you. " When this failed to get the desired response, namely his undivided attention, I lost my patience. I whacked him hard on the shoulder and practically shouted "THOMAS...WAKE UP, I'M PREGNANT" and then I threw the pregnancy test at his head.
This indeed, got his attention. He looked at the test, looked at me and was quiet for a second. Sensing my obvious distress and panic, he simply folded me into a hug and whispered the magic words "Everything will be o.k. " We talked about what it would mean to have a baby, whether we felt we were ready, and how this would change our lives. After an half-hour of talking, Thomas drifted back off to sleep. I sat wide awake, curled in his arms, staring at the ceiling and coming to grips with our new reality. We were going to have a baby. We were going to have a baby. We were going to have a baby. I now had nine months to prepare, because ready or not, we were going to be parents. 
