  Wait, stew, try urlLink this : We were puttering along the Chicago River, watching paddlers from the Flatwater Classic float by, craning to see the tops of sundry architectural marvels.
A perfectly polite, boringly edifying way to spend the afternoon. And then came a gush of goop raining across most of the upper-deck viewing platform... We passed under the bridge and the deluge seemed to pick up, getting stronger as the passengers toward the rear of the boat approached the waterfall.
The stuff splat heavily on the deck, dousing dozens of white-haired ladies and gents in nylon windbreakers. There was confusion. Then the smell hit us. An unmistakable stink: porta-potty juice. "Oh, God. " The woman next to me turned and said to no one, "I had my mouth open. " " urlLink Witnesses on the architectural sightseeing cruise told police they saw a long black tour bus dump liquid waste Sunday afternoon as their boat crossed under the Kinzie Street bridge... One witness gave Chicago police an Oregon license plate number that belongs to the 2003 Monaco Royale Coach driven by Jerry Fitzpatrick, who has been [Dave] Matthews' tour bus driver for three years.
"'This band is very environmentally conscious,' [Fitzpatrick] said. 'We wouldn't have anything to do with this sort of thing. '" Maybe he was coming from one of his concerts for Kerry! 
