  Yesterday was a long day. I had work, which went by somewhat fast. I found out that things between Lisa and I have degraded even more.
All yesterday... I felt a combination of confusion, guilt, hate, anger, and sadness. It's a realization that things have gotten to a level where we really have serious problems with each other and I'm tempted to just quit. I feel sad, because we used to be such close friends. It's just that so much I can't forgive her for. I know I hurt her really bad, but I was hurt too. I don't know if she knows how betrayed I felt at her hypocrisy in so many ways.
I wish things didn't have to happen the way it did, but I know if I was in the same position I was back then... I would probably do the same. I feel like I should probably talk to her... I know things have been blown out of proportion. After work I met up with some of the girls and went to see Janet in her new place. Then we had dinner at Claim Jumper. That was the first time I've ever finished a meal at Claim Jumper. Then again I guess chicken is light meat. Later met Steff's new boyfriend. We were going to watch a movie, but ended up bowling instead.
I was sort of sucking it at the begining, but then I started improving. I was doing a lot better in the second game. On the drive back I said that I was probably gonna go hang out with someone who I know that maybe I shouldn't. Steff kind of yelled out a critical "Why!? " I've noticed that Steff is probably the only friend that, when commenting or offering advice... tells me things I don't necessarily want to hear.
I think that's important. That's not to say that other friends' advice isn't valuable, but I think it's good that I have a friend that really gives it to me like it is. I think I went to sleep rather late... around 2? That means I was up from 8 AM to 2 AM yesterday / today and I woke up around 11 AM.
I had weird dreams last night about battling aliens. I was hunting them at night and taking their weapons and then selling them in a seedy bar... all RPG style. The other one was being in an amusement park type place and having lunch with the kids from Spy Kids. My head hurts... I really think I got a concussion. It's PM's birthday today... need to get him something before 6 PM. *** 
