  Well...I survived, if that's what you can call it. It always amazes me how hubby escapes under the wire and i get all tangled up in it. We didn't talk about mr x which HIGHLY surprised me...we talked mostly about my temper. I love how our counselor tries to put words in my mouth...it is so evident that if I agree to what he says I will get punted across the room. Yes, this occured again Friday. He tried to get me to say that if hubby showed affection and intimacy that I would not have a temper problem. Uh, no! NOT what I was saying....I said, I have had mad stress at work, family life, and with hubby...my hubby has no idea the other stuff that I have been stressing about...so that makes it worse. However, even if he did his part, the other stress would be there...it is just that with the other stress his not doing his part makes it worse...I am beyond the whole "i am an island" bull shit...i want someone there beside me.
Boy, it was funny to see him back peddle on that one. We talked about our lack of church/christian friends...I finally pointed out after two years that this was not my choice that this was because of hubby. To which he told me that I could be friends independently of hubby. Yeah, I do know that...but it makes it difficult when you never see anyone. It isn't like I am going to call up X and say...hey, I haven't seen you for a year, you wanna be friends? Please! Counselor told me that half of everyone does what we do schedule wise and still finds time for friends...I have friends, just not the friends that I suppose he thinks I should have. Quite a few of my friends are religious, I don't know if they are Christians...heck, I don't know if the people that go to my church are Christians!
But I am also beyond the "you have to go to xyz church to be saved"...yes, I believe there will be catholics in heaven. Anyway...I disagree with the half thing...It is very different to work full-time but have both parents home at night...I am a single parent throughout the week (as is hubby)...we have family time on the weekends...It is alot of work, not being able to SHARE the workload. It just aggravates me that he would say he was an authority on the matter...I don't do babysitting much during the week...that is my time with B...and by the time we get home, he has had a full day and doesn't want to go out.
I am not complaining...we chose this, we deal with it...but I don't need anyone, who doesn't have ANY idea what we are going through, to pass judgement on why I am to blame I don't have the "appropriate" friends...hubby really didn't have much to say. The other fun one is accountability...every week we are supposed to basically sit down and bitch at each other about the week...what you could have done differently, what I should have done differently...does it sound like the breeding ground for war to anyone else??? Healthy conflict is what I have been striving for...not what I think hubby wants. I basically said I didn't like it and didn't want to do it...got blasted for that one! So, we are going to do it...lovely. Ahhh...I hate griping so much so I will make this the last...church. Why would you have all couples who are "committed to each other" come forward...yeah, i'm pretty sure it never crossed my hubby's mind to go up...we didn't and I think we were the only couple left in the pew...I was hurt at first, but now, I just am looking at it from hubby's view...says alot to me about where he is at.
Was at grams everyday last week...whew! I need a break! It has to be hard to get to the end of the road and have to start divying up your stuff...I am so glad she is in town now...I just need to be able to keep sanity. It is really amusing to see my parents. They have no patience with her...I'm not sure why, but it makes me wonder if that is how I am with hubby's mom... 
