  ugh...I get so tired of people projecting their feelings and emotions onto me... bf called...told her I had two numbers for her x. Asked her to really consider if she wants them. I offered myself up as an example of how a spouse can take it...she said a) i would never tell my hubby, i think that was so wrong...and b) i am not looking to "hook-up"...excuse me?! All I responded was that I believe honesty is the best policy even when it hurts...she said, if you were honest with yourself you would admit that you wanted to start something with mr x. um, no...i have been honest with myself. do people think that it is easy for me to admit that when i did call to get CLOSURE i was so messed up that i started re-playing a tainted view of reality in my head??? I mean, come on! The guy was psycho...why was i such a lame-o that i considered it for a few days???
that's honesty. i am kinda upset but i don't really know why i care. i think because it just keeps tearing away the phisod of what i thought was a mature, adult, WOMAN friendship...it is a woman friendship...never able to quite get past the cattiness of nature to be real. and to that i say UGH. she also said something to the effect that she thinks her x still wants her...and that i will never really know if mr x still wants me because he never saw me now, just remembering what i was in high school.
ouch! what the fuck does that mean? and how the fuck was i supposed to react to that? now i'm getting more mad. i just am tired of people draining me to make themselves feel better and i truly need to stop giving a flying fuck. on a happier note, since i am throwing around the f word...a guy i work with, who NEVER swears, said clusterfuck a few weeks ago. I don't think i had ever heard that one and it made me laugh SO HARD! so now, whenever it is visible that he is frustrated, i ask him what word he would use to describe how he feels...to which he replies "FUBAR, CF" interpretation: FUCKED UP BEYOND ALL RECOGNITION, CLUSTER FUCK good day! 
