  Why do I still feel like I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing, not at the place where I'm supposed to be? Why are we, at large, plagued by this unhappiness, this dissatisfaction with our lives? For me, I think I have a lot of issues to work out with dissatisfaction and pride. I still don't get why I'm not full of gratitude. I still don't get why I act like a spoiled child, demanding all these from God.
But I don't want to spend the next five years staring at computer screens, and that's what I might have to do. Still haven't applied to fellowships, though I've been telling myself to do so for the past 2 months; deadlines are drawing near. Tim, why are you this way? Historically, I've always been a distracted person. I've thus never really handed assignments in on time, my work has always been of low quality because I don't have the focus to work on it with full attention.
Is it a problem of motivation?
Tim, why are you this way?
When the problems in life hit because of personal failures and character faults, how does one escape from the viscious cycle of frustration? Tim, the I AM will pull you from this miry clay. From the perspective of the world, I am pathetic and weak-willed. Tim, the I AM will show you His Kingdom. 
