  the real way to have a chinese tea ceremony so, during my esl session with david today, i asked him what the customs are associated with the tea ceremony and he told it to me from the beginning.... the groom arrives at the bride's house with an even number of "brothers" (groomsmen) and the girls aren't easy about opening the door to them. so they have devise ways to convince them to open the door, like promise lots of money! they might even knock and try to tear the door down, the point is the girl can't be taken so easily. once he is in, they serve tea ( sun po cha , "in-law tea") to the bride's parents and older married relatives of the bride.
they sit in the center of the house for the ceremony and enjoy tong seuy ("sugar water," sweet soup) before heading over to the groom's. the groom's eldest relatives are served first (like his grandparents). i learned that it is okay for the couple to not have prepared the tea. and after the ceremony, in a traditional chinese ceremony, they would hang out and eat, which is what w+w did (and we found it so odd that the graceful bride was eating mouthful-sizes of sandwich).
david told me the groom's party will sprinkle hong jo (red dates) and rice on the bed. symbolism: jo is part of this expression where it has another meaning and it says, "early, quickly, have your sons! " and rice on the bed is just to ensure that you don't go hungry.... a far cry from rose petals, huh?
:p a traditional wedding dinner has 12 dishes (don't know if that includes dessert) and in total four soups are served: three salty ones throughout the meal, and one sweet one at the end. they will serve shark's fin soup (expensive) and seafood because if they don't, the groom will be viewed of as being "mean. " other must-have items are shrimp ( ha , sounds like laughter) and chicken. the groom (and bride? ) goes around to every table to make toasts and they carry one bottle of wine for him and one bottle of water so he doesn't get too drunk. he'll drink wine if the table he is toasting insists he drinks wine. urlLink read more.... 
