  my world is in the middle of a complete upheaval, but this time it's by my own doing and it's the kind of upheaval that makes one's life a little brighter.
in a month or less, I'll finally escape the town that has held me hostage for the past three years and taken my life through a transformation that, in the long run, was probably for the best. granted, at times it sucked raw, bloody ass, but there have also been some incredibly bright points. I've found my family in the City. I know I can stay here if I want to, and never be lonely as long as I live here. while I may never establish one single place with a roof and walls as my one true home, there's no doubt where that home will be. I can leave and come back at any time now, which is definitely something I have to do. give me a good year to pick up a few broken parts and spackle them back together and we're in business. I even think I know where I want to go, and who I want to become... I'll never leave the grasp of Los Angeles completely. if anything right now, I'm only compelled to bring myself closer to the heart of the Dream Factory for awhile.
in the process of helping my mom get back home, I've realized where my home is too. I am the first generation Angeleno. this place is what I am, where I came from and who I will always be. so what if the search for intelligent life here is endless? lately, I've been plucking more than the usual number of gems. his name is Cargan...odd name, right? I thought so, but it's kind of grown on me. quite a bit, actually. okay, I'm twitterpated.
seriously, even innocent thoughts about him get me a little stiff. he could very well be the Yin. I'm completely stupid around him, and there are so many stupid reasons why this is the case. I can't explain it. all I can do it go with it... 
