  Welcome back, Spelling Bee! I've decided to reinstate this blog because I have too many genres floating about in my head, and for some reason they won't fit together in one space. Also I'm tired of keeping my teenage angst livejournal and feel that a little more pep might be in order. One would wish I could be creative and you might view this as "ooohhh! ahhhh! look how surprising and interesting...it's a poem, it's an essay, it's a new kind of spaghetti sauce!
" but i'm not. So there. Eat your Ragu and be happy. A couple of days ago I was on the phone with Brayton (please note, much of my life takes place on the phone, as people-type interactions ended about three years ago now) and she narrated to me the dismay of not finding the particular type of Prego she desired on the shelf of her local mini-mart type store (in the pear we might refer to this as a "deli. " However I will wager to guess that the only type of meat product in cole valley Brayton could purchase in said-type establishment is the one we're about to get to, let alone anything with the boar's head label. We usually go and purchase ice-creamables when i'm about.
none of the options that I recall involve chocolate-covered paper-thin sliced ham). She found, in fact, that they did not carry Prego, but only it's bastard cousin, Ragu. The options presented were original, mushroom, and meat. She chose meat. I suggested she perhaps choose original and add some type of animal to it later that she could purchase separately. She declined my solution and said she could just add onions and pepper to this one.
Now, normally, I would not object that much to this type of decision. I'm not a vegetarian, although my stomach lurches with great horror whenever we pass the cows at harris ranch on the way to Pasadena. Still, I eat the beef. My main objections, and desire for clarification really, to this purchase were the following: How does Ragu desire to define "meat? " Is "meat" a real food product, or an acronym? And can you really be terribly sure that when they say meat, the little globules of M-E-A-T floating about in her tomato-based product like bubbles in bubble tea are in fact processed from a non-domestic non-crazy-like animal?
And how do they stay non-refridgerated? does that whole sealed in a jar business really guarantee freshness? What possesses a person to make this type of choice, say "oh, I really hope i don't get mad cow," and then actually go buy the product? Once the words "mad cow" are out of your mouth, shouldn't you be more cautious? Or was she banking on the fact that "meat" remained ambiguous, and to the best of my knowledge you cannot catch mad turkey or mad pig? Anyway.
I haven't heard from Brayton since thursday, but neither have I heard from Deese, so I'm guessing all's well with the babies. 
