  At the end of Civil Procedure today, the class presented the professor with a monogrammed bathrobe and a set of shower accessories -- he had said at the end of class one day that class had been so stimulating that he needed to go home and take a shower. This is a 70-year-old man, by the way. So his response to the gift was "this is something my wife and I will enjoy. Perhaps together. " In that spirit, I present a very disturbing Top 5 list of other things he meant to say.
(I apologize that without some Civil Procedure knowledge, this isn't that funny). 5. "For all the places my Long Arm can't reach! " 4. "This soap smells just like my arthritis cream. " 3. "I can use it to wash my Hanson and my Denckla. " 2. "This will allow my wife and I to engage in some new forms of Discovery. " 1. "This soap will help me clean my most personal jurisdiction of them all!
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