  Family Visit Some of you may know about my family stories. The ill shit right? Well. We had a visit from our cousins from St. Mary's County. I hadn't seen them in years. In fact, my little cousin doubles as my godchild so it was great seeing her.
I'll call her Cassie. Cassie and her sisters are mulatto, look white but black identified and and waaaaaaaaaay waaaaaaaay country. She has an older sister, "Mercedes" and a younger sister, "Hayley". All three of them kick ass as a way of life. Since they were tots, they've been a triple threat of ass kickin' little yungins. They were brought up rough and exposed to major disfunction so there you have it.
They are not to be fucked with. There's one catch. THEY ARE HOT! I mean three major cuties. So many uh bitches done slept on em and got their asses kicked on a humble...lol. Lemme give you a little history.
They all came to spend the Summer with us about 15 years ago. My dad took them to the neighborhood playground (where all the little bad kids hang out) so they all could play. Cassie was 7 and Hayley was 5. Layla and Mercedes just went along for the ride. They were officially "big kids" so the playgound didn't impress them of course. My dad sat in the car reading the paper while the kids played.
There were these dusty little bad girls hogging the swings and basically daring anybody to say anything to them. Cassie and Hayley wanted to swing but they kept getting shade from these little girls. Once the patience wore off, some words ensued. As my dad tells it, he heard a little tap on the side of the car door. It was Hayley. She said, "Uncle L, I'm rhet to go.
A fight fittin' to break out! " So my dad looks up and sure enough, Cassie is whuppin' ass. He had to go out there, break it up, and take the kids home cuz Cassie done swole a few heads on the playground. During the ride back, it's dead silence. All of a sudden, Hayley blurts out, "I shoulda stole one of em! " LMAO!!!
My dad said he almost died laughing cuz li'l Hayley is like 5 and she talkin bout stealing somebody. Ever since then, Hayley was a badass...lol. Last weekend, Cassie came by to show us her new baby who is just a precious as he wants to be. A beautiful two month old. We're all sitting in my parents' livingroom talking and catching up. Cassie starts telling us how shit been for the past 5 years.
She didn't graduate from high school cuz she knocked the principal out cold. So she's in a GED program now. Her parents sent her ass to Alabama (with our extended family) but she only stayed for a year because she kept gettin into fights. Her and her sisters got shot at a while back and the gunWOMAN shot up their trailer. Apparently the chicks down there carry guns. She kicked some girls ass while she was 5 months pregnant.
And then....her most recent account of a bar fight gone bad....... She said her and Hayley went to a bar and they got drunk. Mercedes' baby's father had a chick on the side who didn't like the fact that Cassie was there. A fight broke out. Cassie was awf da, "Why she wanna fuck with me? I ain't got shit to do with Mercedes' baby daddy! " The chick and three of her friends tried to jump Cassie.
We're all sitting there listening to her like - WHAT?! - and Cassie is talking about this shit like it's normal. So she goes, "Nah, I wasn't worried cuz it was four bitches. I know I had them. So I just started throwin bodies and fuckin' em up. But I got punched so hard in the face, I slid across the table and it was then that I realized a dude had punched me!
" The girls ran and let some dudes beat Cassie and Hayley. Cassie said, "By the time I got myself together, they had thrown Hayley into the jukebox! " Then she said, "I was so drunk I didn't even realize that I was getting fucked up so I kept throwing haymakers! " So finally, her and Hayley made it home and Cassie said, "I woke up the next morning, I had an ice pack on my head, an ice pack on my hand, and a dayumed ice pack on my eye! " We're like STUNNED listenin' to this. She said, "Yeh man!
I had staples in my head, my thumb was broken, and I had a black eye! " By this time the whole livingroom erupted in laughter. Just the way she was telling the story killed us. LOL!!! She said, "Hayley told me some dude hit me across the head with a bottle and she pulled the chucks of glass out. I was too dayumed drunk to feel dat shit!
" Me, Layla, Sparkle and my other sister are sitting there with our mouths wide open. Amazed. My mom and dad are in tears laughing. Then everybody starts telling their own ass-kicking stories. The shit was funny. Sparkle and Layla done invited Cassie down this weekend to hang out and she'll be here.
I can't wait. LOL!!!! ! 
