  Hi. I'm DJ Shovelpants. You may remember me from my occasional posts on this here site 'Pandyland. ' Yeah, it's kind of an internet discussion group. You know. Well, I haven't been posting much. Why? Probably because there hasn't been much news for me to share. Then why are you posting now, DJS?
Nice set-up. Thanks for that. Well, I've actually got some news. Coming this February, there will be an addition to the Shovelpants family. You're getting a new dog? Oh, that's great news! Nope. Around February 11th or so, I'm going to be a dad. Wait, let me do the math. You were married in April, that's....carry the 3, minus 2...plus 6. Wow. You guys didn't waste any time. Oh, shut up. 
