  so. ill finally write.. its gav's bday and we went out. hes 7 and i got him a kickass ramones shirt. ive had a few beers. and you know. pnut and sa are on loveline. (enter lust here. ) so i worked all day on easter. and then i didnt get to go to an english mass, despite the catholic guilt complex. dad went to some woman named claudias parents house in cherokee with her and her kids. and mom went to bills parents. and jus was with amber and her family. and me? i went to lisas and then out with S and her mom.
she got me a basket. is that sweet? im glad i have some "family" here. ellen sent me pics of easter at joes. i am grateful. she knows i miss everyone although i never vocalize it. some people are good at reading me, and i dont have enough of those people around. S can. lisa can a lot. the girls i love at home could once. .......sad.
so.
something is right under my skin fighting its way out and i dont want to deal with it. dearest SF i miss you, please visit me. i think i was closer with you than anyone so far. mentally.
you know? we never had to say a damn word. move here? everything going as it is has left me feeling like something is missing. and i know what it is. i miss the contact. the humanity of it. what brings us all together. where is that? goddamn.......................... so. yeah. i cant verbalize anything, but the moral of all of this BS is that i miss a lot of people.... and some people that have yet to come along. -fin- 
