  what a hard day...... will i ever make it through college? i feel i strive on stress.... on pressure. i am miserable at the time, yet i feel the most rewarded as successful when i pull through. this is bad, why? because i am sure that the stressed out folks of corporate america feel like this as well.. everyday.
and what comes of it? money, which i clearly don't care about, and ulcers. i swear, everday i have a new epiphany.... something that both opens my eyes and knocks me on my ass. this is amazing for my journey of self discovery and learning, but is hard on me, for i have so muh else i must focus my time and energy on. july is soon approaching. this is the last thanksgiving, christmas, easter i have with my family.......... the last year i have with "my people" here at home. i will have to establish an entire new life out there........ and that will be so hard. job? place? friends? boy? good god.................. p.s. not to fret. my fortune today says this: "someone from your past has returned to steal your heart.
" are you willing to take it? feels i am willing to give..... it was wonderful to spend time with you today, although we were not alone. maybe this will get our ball moving? all the intillectual/sexual maturity talk had me questioning things..... you accused our pal of having things going on with the girl friend.... saying his girl wouldnt dig. does your girl know? tell me how you feel. are you sneaking around? am i one of the guys? if he cant have a girl friend and hang out with her one on one, can you? are we pushing some boundary i was unaware of? i hope so. i saw you last night..... did you want me to? it was beautiful....... tight and silhouetted....and again after you left. i like what i see................ now on: the cure- just like heaven 
