  Hello everybody, ah what a lovely Thursday afternoon!! Yup the rain is hammering down, the temperature has dropped to 3 degrees and every woman's nipples have frozen in town! Firstly, is it me or not??? Take a close look at Captain Kirk in the picture below........look closer.....now, is it me or does it look like the Captain has been sucking at a Heinz tomato ketchup bottle?!?!?! Secondly, I think we should track down that guy in the background, find out where he lives and then give him anti depressants! Thirdly, actually I can't say it, so nevermind! So I was driving the worktruck through town the other day, going past the post office, and I saw something that made me smile. What did I see??? 'It was a cold January afternoon, the kind of typical new years chill that warns of the cold freeze about to begin was hanging in the air as fine droplets of rain spattered on the road, forming small puddles that rippled with every disturbance. The inside of the cab was clouded up as the breath of its inhabitants condensed against its cold dewed surface, at the same time the trucks heating system battled to defeat the damp air.
' Anyway, what made me laugh...... well there I am driving past the post office and I see this big banking dude wearing a 400 suit, a silverplate edged briefcase sitting beside him on the kerb as......wait for it..... he stands there using a footpump to pump up his clapped out old 1989 Ford Fiesta, and getting all wet in theprocesss!!! So I think to myself, I have a spare few minutes so I'll just go and offer my assistance to this poor fellow man so that he can take a break. Then, just as I was approaching level with him in my nice big truck I had this little thought that said 'Baity, look at that rich fuck, standing all defenseless on the road, don't help him.....fuck him over and teach him a lesson from the working class!!!! ' So obviously I obeyed my inner voice and within a split second I formulated a masterful plan of vengeancee against my (now) ENEMY- the rich man!
I cranked the trucks gears up a notch and proceeded to aim for the reasonable sized puddle that lay just six inches from the frantically pumping banker! Two seconds later, my plan came to fruition and as I sped away, with a satisfied grin of accomplishment on my face, I checked my large side view mirror just in time to see my target brushing himself down, quite obviously displeased with the fact that not only did he have a flat tyre but a totally fucked suit and a now soaked briefcase that now lay side down in a pool of dirty water!!! The moral of the story is that no matter how much higher people may seem to you, you can still be a winner! Baity signing off..... 
