  ...to the abject failure that is the Glennis. We both do the same job. I'm senior sales, he's SMT (Store Management Trainee - it used to be SMD, stood for "Suck My Dick" - while accurate, it was a little obnoxious). That means at this point, we're both opening and closing the store, we both have our own set of keys (mine are coming), we both have alarm codes, we both run the floor, we both do high shrink counts and we both sell. I do all of this better than he does. That's not hubris talking. That's not ego. It's the bold fucking truth. Sweet, ain't it. See, when I run the floor, we make money. I ran the open today - we were up to 50% of target at 4, with fairly decent numbers.
Glen ran the close, - when I dropped by, we had actually LOST ground - that's right, we were at less volume than when I had given him the floor. Secondly, I run a sucessful program - open box. I'm hoping to add clearance to the sucessful list by the end of the week - we're best of Canada in the region on both now. Glen - well, they bounced him from clearance (it sucked) to monster (it sucks, we didn't even have the most basic tools one needs to present the shit - way to go fearless leader) to (now) basket.
He's like a Failure-leper, breeding suckassageness where ever he may wander. He's a patronizing son of a bitch to boot. He tried to make me look bad today - going on about how I'd lost a report - the Returns Audit Report (the bump) that I was supposed to file. Funny thing? It was "lost" because I'd already filed it. Get off my efficient ass motherfucker or I will put you down like a rabit badger.
(Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger). Bodh asked me what had changed about my approach to work over the past few months - I let him know that I've become a more goal oriented person. My goal? Total domination of the Glennis' soul. What do I do when I hit the goal? There shall be a mighty party. There will be punch and pie. 
